Momma, It’s OK that you’re late on Sunday: Beginning to See God’s Compassionate Heart

Late again.

I tiptoed my way through the aisle, baby in one arm, bags and sippy cups in the other, the toddler clinging to my skirt. We not-so-quietly made our way to the seats saved by my husband, who had arrived earlier to pray for the service.

I sank into my seat, relieved to have made it through the Sunday morning church dash, and breathed a sigh of relief. We made it.

Only seconds later, as worship music played in the background, the accusations started:

You’re late again.

You should have gotten up earlier.

You missed your quiet time.

And not just this morning…many times this week.

You don’t deserve to be here.

I tried to lift up my eyes to the Lord, to find some way through the heaviness, but the bouncy toddler at my feet kept pulling my heart away and forcing me to deal with the problem directly in front of me.

He knew the church routine and usually had no trouble staying quiet, but today, he just could not sit still. His wrappers crinkled. He drove the cars a little too noisily. He bounced up and down, from the seat to the floor and back again.

I felt the eyes of the room on me.

Did they think I was a bad mom for not having my kids under control?

Did they think I should take him out of the room to discipline him?

Oh, I wished they could know what I knew. He wasn’t being rebellious. He had just been up late, and his two-year-old body didn’t know how to be still when he was tired. Life with the new baby sister had been a transition for all of us. I hadn’t been able to spend as much time with him as I would have liked. And the Cheerios that he was eating right now were his breakfast – because our morning routine was shot with a new baby.

I knew. My Momma heart knew all that was going on with my sweet little boy. I knew about all his circumstances. I knew about the nights he couldn’t sleep, and the troubling dreams that kept him awake, late into the night.

As I handed his sister to Daddy, and scooped the bouncy boy into my lap, the Lord, who is so kind and gentle, and knows how to meet us exactly where we are at, spoke to me through a verse, memorized years earlier:

“If you, [Momma], being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more, does your Heavenly Father give good gifts to the children he loves?”[1]

How much more.

If I, a sinful mama, who has made many mistakes and falls short all the time, can show mercy to my tiny child, how much more, how much more, can my heavenly father, who is mindful of me[2], who knows everything about me, who knows my comings and my goings, when I fall and when I rise up[3]… how much more, is my heavenly Father able to show compassion and mercy towards me?

The love of God filled my heart.

God knew.

God knew.

Of course he always had, but on this day, I became aware of the mercy of God in a way I hadn’t experienced before.

If I, as a mom, filled with many faults and failures, could give mercy to my child, could not my perfect heavenly Father give mercy to me – and so much more?

“For God did not send his Son into the world to judge the world …”[4]

Sometimes, I think we get this picture that God is standing over us, counting every wrong, pointing out every failure. It’s the idea that shipwrecked the man in the parable of the talents (see Luke 25). He was so afraid of a God who judges looking down on him, that he got paralyzed and couldn’t do anything.

But our God is not a harsh taskmaster. Our father did not send his son into the world to judge and condemn the world.

No. Our God knows us. He sees us in our weakness. He travails for us.[5] Our God knows all and yet still is for us[6] – and so much more even, than we are for our own children.

Yes, our God says be holy as I am holy[7]. And we are not to set aside the grace of God [8], that gives us everything we need to serve the Lord and live for him. There are definitely times when God does give us the grace to show up on time, to have the morning quiet time even though it’s been a crazy night, to make it to gather with his people on Sunday morning – on time – even though everything is against us. He does do this, and we rejoice and seek to know him and that power of his overcoming, resurrection life more and more.[9]

But when we fail, we need to know that our God is not standing over us to condemn us.

The very God who gives grace to overcome hard situations is the same God who tells his disciples, “I desire compassion …”[10]

The God who calls us into this says, “If anyone sin, we have an advocate with the Father.”[11]

The God who knows everything about us says, “for we do not have a high priest unable to sympathize with us,”[12] and “If God is for us, who can be against us?”

We have a God who knows. He knows about our late nights. He knows about our tired, weary bodies. He knows that we want to be in the word more than we are, and that we long for just 5 continuous minutes in the day when no one is screaming “mooooommmmmmmeeeeeee” …. and He sympathizes.

The Bible says, “he gently leads those who are with young.”[13]

He knows us. And he is so, so gentle and merciful. Even when we can’t lift up our eyes to him, he often meets us through the child at our feet, just as he did with me that Sunday.

He’s not standing over you to judge you, Momma. And you know what I learned eventually? Most of those people in the church are not either. Actually, most of them are joyful to see you. They are joyful to hear the cries of young children in the gathering of believers. They are joyful to see your family filling the seats. And most all of them have a story to share from those busy days (even if they were long ago). They remember that poopy diaper right before they left out the door for church; the child that puked on the way to the church gathering; that time they got everyone in the car and then realized one child had walked out without shoes. They remember. And most of them are just joyful to see that we made it to the church gathering.

So weary mama, be encouraged as you go to gather with the Lord’s people on Sunday.

Just come.

Don’t worry if you’re late. Don’t worry if you didn’t have time to iron the dress or fix your daughter’s hair. Don’t worry if your kiddos are eating their breakfast as you pull in.

Just come. Be amongst his people. And if you get a stare or two from a few who forgot what it’s like to have children, just remember our Lord.

He is for you.

He knows you.

He already paid the price and shed his precious blood so that you could draw near. He is not standing against you in any way. But as a merciful father, who has compassion on his children, he calls you to come, and gather with his people.

And even if things get crazy, trust Him… that he still knows how to bless you through that bouncy child, running underneath your feet.

With love in Christ,

Katherine.